Get out

 The house is solely a gift for living in a prison. I full heartedly forgave. Loved with no boundaries and that was taken for granted. Yes, a piece of me is scared cause I'm walking away from the only life I've known. Half of my life my hopes and dreams laid with this person. I spent last year away from him. I gained the respect of my family and children. I made 100's of close friends. I helped people on days I felt hopeless. So another person will be in the home I built. Someone else will enjoy my sacrifice but they will also spend their nights questioning their worth. Feeling like any effort they've made isn't good enough. Isolating to keep them happy. Dissolving every connection to make them feel important and putting their goals on hold to support a person that will leave them the second they are an inconvenience. I cut all connections with other men for 8 months. I solely focused on him. His needs getting him sober. He solely focused on trying to break me down and make me feel worthless. I created stability while he created chaos. I created love while he created mistrust. Look back on this. I spent months trying to rebuild our family. He claimed to only of been with me but in reality he was leaving work early, sneaking out while I was sleeping and fucking other people behind my back then coming home and acting like he was a good man. He fucked someone while you slept the night you came home from the hospital. He left work early to fuck the person who destroyed him and his life. He left his children because they were an inconvenience. He doesn't feel love, loyalty or a sense of right or wrong. There is a reason he was alone last year and you were not. He is holding you back.. leave him behind. This is not love. T guy made you feel beautiful about your mind body and soul and I will be forever grateful for that gift. Even though I wasn't ready to love him the same way. He helped me see my beauty. Justin was the man I planned to spend my life with. My husband the father of my children and he left me when I needed him the most every single time he could. He left his children when they needed him the most. His response a little trauma is good it made them stronger..Guess what it did.. I will no longer give you the power of my thoughts. I will no longer give you my attention. I will no longer destroy my self to prove I'm worthy. I will no longer feel worthless. I will thrive in my goals and my career. I will thrive being surrounded by positive people. I will focus on what feels right to me. I will find someone who truly loves me and create a life with them. I will be happy. We are leaving you behind..Enjoy your life.