crossroads

A lot of people conform.. they start off as individuals with a wide open future and then they slowly turn into what they believe they're supposed to.. They dress a certain way to fit in with friends, listen to the same music, eat at the same restaurants, hang out at the same places..eventually there isn't much left of what was actually them.. so they separate from their then norm to find themselves again to only find a single person they enjoy being around to completely change again.. would it be considered growing or lack of self? After you meet this person you move your schedule to be around them, you start to like all the same things, eat the same food and eventually have children that are then raised to follow the same pattern. Lately ive examined my life a lot closer than usual. You spend years stuck in a routine.. and have to wonder is it because i'm happy or too comfortable to change anything? I usually have more people to talk to but recently a very close tie was severed and I don't know if it can be fixed again.. the situation brought back things from my childhood I thought I had gotten over but still weigh on me heavily..The feeling of helplessness..the feeling when someone you love hurts you soo much emotionally it feels like the whole world has gone out of control that if you sat still for even a second you mite not be able to catch your breath again..So what do you do if someone you hold dear wrongs you in a way deemed unforgivable? do you avoid contact, do you cry about it or do you take a step back and examine the whole situation see what went wrong for any of it to happen in the first place..you look at the pros and cons of having this relationship stay in your life..and after all those lists you think about you and your happiness...The hardest part is a lot of people had messed up childhoods so knowing  whats healthy and what isn't is hard to figure out.